6.30am: Woke up before my alarm – winning! Then realised it’s because my head feels like it’s splitting open from the inside of my skull. This is what they call a ‘detox headache’, friends. Painfully regretting Sunday’s champagne escapades.
Peppermint tea helps to ease it.
9.46am: I seem to have lost my sense of humour with these headaches. Peppermint tea does help a little, but doesn’t take them away.
12.03pm: THIS HEADACHE! Maybe one day of this is enough. I mean, how toxic am I, really? At least I’m not hungry, I guess.
2.05pm: Lunch in a glass
5.30pm: Felt hungry for the first time today
6.22pm: My kingdom for a piece of cheese on a cracker. I’m not asking for much.
6.23pm: Lost the will to live. I think my body ate it.
6.24pm: I think it’s dinner time. More juice from this… (at least my grocery/food bill over the past 2 days has been minimal)
7.00pm: Okay, I’m calling it. Will break the fast sometime during the day tomorrow. This life where I can’t have champagne and oysters while watching the sunset is not the one for me (also, I’m sick of freaking peppermint tea, dammit).
It’s been real, guys, I’m all cleansed.