Joburg

Why I emigrated to Cape Town (from Joburg)

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So I did it, dear readers, I emigrated to Cape Town. From Johannesburg. Yes, emigrated, because I feel like I am in a different country here. I hear people talking in the streets and think ‘Ah – some other South Africans around here’ and then realise what a stupid statement that is because I am in South Africa. Candice, you dork.

It’s been a long road and I had to knyp and wingle and wangle for a few months to make the change and the journey – perhaps too much, but that’s all okay now.

Why did I do it? So many people have asked me this question and a multitude of others in the past few months, so let me gather all the questions and answers into one post.

I’ve lived in Joburg most of my life. I’ve done it, I’ve seen it, I got bored. I am by no means putting Joburg down, I just want a change and a different lifestyle – I’m asking Cape Town to give that to me. I don’t understand this rivalry between Cape Town and Joburg, really. They’re two different COUNTRIES, man, right? I don’t appreciate the looks of contempt that I got when announcing my big move. The responses ranged from “I’m so jealous, you’re so lucky” to “Traitor”, “You know the weather’s shit, right?” and “Cape Town people don’t make friends”.

Can I just say a big WTF? Luck has nothing to do with it, my friends. I decided what I wanted and then strategised and worked my butt off to get it. I don’t recall pledging allegiance to a city that no longer makes me happy and correct me if I’m wrong, but I’m sitting here in the warm sunshine while you’re busy swimming through the traffic day in and day out (yeah okay, winter is a different story, but I think you get my drift – it’s what you make of it, really). I also find it difficult to believe that there is a bunch of people out there who don’t want friends. There are Cape Town folk who I am connected to on Twitter who have offered to help me move (who I have never even met), while my Joburg friends are still ‘promising’ to come help me pack 3 months ago.

I digress.

No, I am not running away from anything. No, I did not go through a trauma or have my heart broken by a douchebag. I am running towards a dream and a life that I’ve always wished for. It may not be here, but there is only one way to find out, right?

Hello Cape Town – here’s to a long and fruitful relationship.

Noordhoek, Cape Town

The art of giving this Christmas

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It’s that time of the year again, when we eat too much, drink too much and spend too much money. Well, most of us in any case. For a huge portion of our population, it is a time where people feel the most at loss, especially when it comes to making it a special time for their children.

Enter Dlala Nje’s annual Christmas Party. These guys run a cultural games emporium in Ponte City for the children of Hillbrow and surrounds and throw a Christmas party for these kids every year. They provide a space for children to have fun in a safe environment and enjoy all sorts of activities for the afternoon. They even get a present each and a chance to sit on Santa’s lap!

For a lot of these children, this will be the only Christmas fun that they experience and the only gift that they receive. Orphanages in the area are also invited and it is an afternoon of (mad) fun with face painting, crafts, cupcakes, jumping castles, performances and of course, presents!

We managed to collect about 1000 gifts from many kind hearts (which wasn’t enough!) and spent our afternoon madly helping out with the party. There were so many smiling faces and I am so happy to have been a part of such an amazing initiative. I have all the time in the world for these guys and their cause.

Here are some pictures from the day. I hope that you will be there next year too, to help make a child smile, as Madiba would have liked it!

“There can be no keener revelation of a society’s soul than the way in which it treats its children.” – Nelson Mandela

Dlala Nje
Apparently this is me as an angel – bless!
Dlala Nje 2
What counts in life
Dlala Nje 1
It’s not a party ’til there’s a jumping castle
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DJ rocking the decks
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When making angels turned into making binoculars
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THIS is the coolest car in the world. He was so chuffed with his gift!
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So proud of her snow man Christmas tree decoration
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Face painting is always a hit – even when we have no idea what to paint or how!

Make a big difference this Christmas with Dlala Nje

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The guys down at Dlala Nje in Ponte City are hosting their annual Christmas party for the children living there and in the surrounding areas and orphanages of Hillbrow, Yeoville and Berea on 6 December 2013.

[If you haven’t already heard of these guys, do yourself a favour and explore their website. Two “white okes” move into Ponte City and start making a difference in the lives of the community – it’s unreal what they have accomplished and how they have changed the perceptions of inner city Joburg.]

Nonetheless, the matter at hand is the Christmas party. Last year’s party was a rip-roaring success and you will not believe the amount of hopeful little faces playing outside on the concrete, getting their faces painted and waiting in line to sit on Santa’s lap and get a present (likely the only present they received for Christmas).

I wrote about the experience last year too – check it out here.

This year’s season is upon us and we’d LOVE for some support in the form of gifts or even volunteers to help on the day (second hand toys are also welcome). Please get in touch with them directly, or me, if you would like to help out. It will make such a difference to their lives – you just don’t realise it yet.

Dear Joburg, I’m annoyed with you

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Dear Joburg,

I’ve had some time to think about our relationship while we were on a break, and I’ve decided that I am not okay with how things are going.

Your roads are death traps. Aggression, aggression, aggression. At every intersection, main road, side street, quiet lane, anywhere I venture out in my car I am met with aggression mixed with stupidity. I refuse to speed up way past the speed limit because some wanktard is in a hurry and driving up my ass. Unauthorised back-entry is rude, my friend, and not socially acceptable. Leave 5 minutes earlier if you need to, but don’t make it my problem. I also refuse to drive through a red traffic light because you are hooting behind me. It’s red. Red means stop, fool. I don’t care that the road is clear enough for me to sneak through. It’s a red traffic light. Did they not teach you that in nursery school? Should we take you back there?

I don’t enjoy waiting at my driveway for 10 minutes while the taxi blocks the entire entrance while it offloads and on-loads far too many people than is safe. And you’re IN MY DRIVEWAY!

I don’t enjoy the competition to be the best, the biggest, the richest, drive the sexiest car, have the most Twitter followers, be retweeted by some lonely dork behind his Mac who happens to be big online, or to define my worth by the brands I wear or associate with.

I don’t enjoy that shopping is an activity. And that smacking a wannabe model into a promotional campaign to help you dress yourself is actually exciting. I don’t enjoy that there is a handful of people that you HAVE to associate with to boost your reputation and to get the “favours” you need to succeed. I don’t like that you can hardly trust a Joburg blogger these days because they’re likely being paid or getting free products for everything they write and sincerity no longer exists.

I don’t enjoy that your men think that women are objects and have forgotten how to care about anything other than their image and the way that others perceive them. When did you become a cesspool of douchebaggery?

I don’t like that I am constantly on guard, wandering what people’s ulterior motives are or what they’re looking to steal from me.

I think we should break up.

The scar on South Africa’s pretty face

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Okay, so here’s the follow up to my post on ‘Middle Class Musings’ in Australia.

I’m sitting on the plane in Sydney, about to fly back to Jozi-Town, with mixed feelings. I’ve had three weeks to get used to a way of life that we don’t experience in South Africa.

It needs to be talked about. That embarrassing thing about our country that ruins our beauty. The hideous scar across our perfect face. Crime. It’s such an ugly word. It’s such an ugly thing.

I’ve had three weeks to get used to not having to worry about keeping my handbag close to my side and zipped up wherever I go, not having to look after my belongings like a hawk, not having to keep alert and aware of all my surroundings in case of a mugging, hijacking, smash-and-grab, or bag-snatch. I’ve not worried about locking everything up with bolts and alarms and gates and electric fencing. You don’t realise you are doing it, until you don’t have to do it anymore.

I’ve had to learn to be free and safe. It sounds ridiculous, but I had to learn to do it. Leave my belongings way up on the beach and go swim in the sea, knowing that everything will be there when I get back. I’ve felt safe while driving (very slowly) on the roads – no aggressive pushing, hooting, cutting me off and road rage. The death toll over the recent long weekend was 9 and this caused an uproar at the shock of such a high number.

I go back to South Africa with a heavy heart. I feel sad for us that we live in fear and don’t realise it because that is what we know and are used to.

That being said, the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence. Especially when the fence is barb-wired.
It’s also greener where you water it.

grass-always-greener-other-side

Uber chauffeur service now in Jozi!

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Listen up, folks – you want to hear about this. I tried out Uber chauffeur service on the weekend and was thoroughly impressed.

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It’s a 5 star chaffeur service, run exclusively by an app on your iPhone/Android. Here’s how it works:

  1. Download the UBER mobile app (iPhone/Android) or go online at m.uber.com, and register (you will need to enter your credit card details to register, but don’t worry – your details are safe)
  2. Pinpoint your pickup location (and if you want a  quote and estimated trip time, your final destination too), and order your chauffeur.
  3. You will be sent a confirmation SMS and be provided with the details and photo of your driver, details of the car and registration as well as estimated time of arrival. You can contact the driver via phone/SMS at any time if you need to.
  4. Don’t worry about waiting outside: the app shows you exactly where your driver is and you’ll get a text message when your car is arriving.
  5. You will be picked up in a BMW 3/5 Series, Mercedes E /S Class  or Audi A6s. No messing around with average cars!

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6. All payments are seamlessly processed with your account’s credit card, there’s no need to tip, and a receipt is immediately emailed after your ride.

Now here’s the part you really need to pay attention to…

Uber has sponsored some free rides to up to 1,000 popcorncandi.com readers! When you register, enter the promo code “PopcornCandi” (not case sensitive) and get 2 free rides up to R200 each. (Note: The promo is only available to new users)

Go on – give it a try, you will not be disappointed. Feel free to share this with your friends as well so that they can experience it too.

For more info: Find their website here or find them on Twitter here.

Sensation SA Innerspace 2013 – My review

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Many people are surprised to hear that I attend some of the big EDM parties – it doesn’t seem to fit with my perceived image.  Their idea of these things is grossly inaccurate and I find great entertainment is people’s facial expressions when I tell them I’m going to a “rave”. But I do love to immerse myself in a different world from time to time, where the DJ and visual effects take your heart right down into your stomach and then explode it out again through your brain (really not sure how else to explain it).

So here’s my review of the much talked about Sensation Innerspace party last night.

The visual effects were phenomenal. Really. The elaborate revolving stage and DJ booth, fountains of water and lights, massive white balls hanging from the ceiling that lit up different colours and moved with the music, fireworks, smoke explosions, digital screens, it was unbelievable.

Sensation SA Innerspace 2013

The Deluxe area was great. Clean bathrooms with free perfume samples, plenty of open space, seating, tables, couches, coat check, decent bars (although they ran out of a lot of basics quite early, which was really unacceptable, considering the ticket price that didn’t include any free drinks). The sound there was great. A walk down in the general area showed some serious sound echo issues, though, which would have driven me bonkers.

As for the music, well, it was less than desirable for me, I’m afraid. Put a decent trance DJ on the stage and I’m happy, but the music last night was really not my style. I don’t think it was a lot of people’s style either. The crowd was quite young, though and this was likely their “first rave”, so they would have enjoyed whatever EDM was blasting through the speakers, I’m sure (me=judging).

My summary? Great production and a phenomenal visual show. Ruined by the music, the “wet-behind-the-ears” crowd and being heavily overpriced.

There are bigger things in life than #FirstWorldProblems

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I had the most eye-opening Mandela Day experience with Dlala Nje last Thursday. In the midst of having a ‘woe is me’ few days, I pulled it all together and went to help Dlala Nje out with their Hillbrow blanket walk and party for the Ponte kids at Maboneng.

We started the afternoon off by taking some blankets to those living in a park near Ponte City, hailed “Junkie Park” for obvious reasons. There is only one word to describe what I saw and experienced: HECTIC. These people literally live in the park and are hopelessly addicted to a drug or few. Walking in there was like walking into heavy smog, although it was a clear day. Desperate eyes look at you – the kind of desperation that I have never (and will never have) experienced in my life. Behind those eyes was darkness. It was chilling. They swarmed us as we started to hand out blankets. Desperate.

As we walked away from there, someone called out “they’re only going to sell those for drugs, you know”. They’re probably right. At least the sold blanket will end up keeping someone warm, I guess.

Next up was to round up the kids living in Ponte Towers and to go on a walk through Hillbrow, handing out blankets to the homeless along the way. More desperate eyes were met. People fought with each other for them. For a BLANKET. It was touching to see the kids take the blankets off their backs (it was a pretty chilly afternoon) and give it to those that needed it more than them. We dodged man-holes along the way (the covers are stolen to sell to scrap metal dealers) and stopped kids from falling into sewerage. This is their neighbourhood.

When we reached Fox Street, where the Maboneng District had prepared a party for the kids in the area, the little boy next to me lit up when he saw the jumping castle. “Is that a jumping castle?” he said. “Yes, it’s lots of fun, hey?” “I don’t know, I’ve never been on one.” He was ordered to immediately take his shoes off and jump on. He ran for that jumping castle, with the biggest holes in his socks I have ever seen (he might as well have not been wearing any), with pure joy that I have not seen in a long time.

I left there feeling humbled and emotional. And grateful for the life that I have. My woes were small in comparison to what so many people in our country experience and overcome every single day of their lives.

If every one of us just gave something to the desperate community on our doorstep, or even better, helped to empower others, it will go a long way in making our country more bearable for a lot of people. Pay it forward.

There are bigger things in life than #FirstWorldProblems.

Bringing meaning to ‘cultural cohesion’ – Dlala Nje

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If you were looking for something awesome today, I’ve found it for you: Dlala Nje at Ponte City.

Two white guys move into one of Joburg’s most iconic (and most historically-jaded) buildings, in the heart of Hillbrow and decide to make a difference.

They’ve taken on a project to provide the kids in Ponte City and the surrounding streets with a safe place to play and explore their own creativity by creating Dlala Nje (“Just Play” in Zulu).

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I really can’t do it justice with my feeble explanation of what these guys have done and are still doing – this video will show you the heart behind the cause:

They’re also throwing a Christmas Party for the kids in the area at Dlala Nje on Friday evening. We’ve spent hours wrapping presents we got together for the children and it promises to be an unbelievable experience for these kids who, quite frankly, are used to playing with old tyres and sticks. I can’t wait to see their painted faces glow with happiness tomorrow.

If you want to help the cause (let’s be honest, this is an unbelievable creative CSI initiative for a corporate as well), get in touch with the guys via their Facebook page. Watch this space!

I’ll be sure to post about the Christmas party too 🙂

I think that it would be ignorant of me to say well done to these guys for what they have done and are still doing with Dlala Nje, because I ave not been a part of their journey from the start, but I will say thank you to them and people like them who care about their own communities and those around them. If we can all take a piece of what they have put together, we will go a long way to transforming our beautiful Jozi.

Fine Brandy.By Design – at Taste of Joburg 2012

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Cool name, huh? Fine Brandy.By Design “is a collection of fine brandies that are changing how people see brandy, more especially how one consumes it.”

In plain English? Brandy cocktails, baby!

Introducing…The Franklin!

OudeMeester Demant, bitters and ginger ale, with lemon rinds. Oh Em Holy Crap – favouritist favourite!

Do yourself a favour and get down to the Taste of Joburg show at Monte Casino (started last night and on all weekend) and hit the Fine Brandy.By Design stand. They have the most delicious brandy cocktail and food pairing. Being a veggie, I had the mushroom risotto paired with The Franklin…twice…it was amazing.

For the meaties, they also had two meat options – I didn’t pay too much attention, but I seem to remember that they were some sort of pork belly and lamb dishes paired with brandy cocktails.

I am an absolute convert to the brandy revolution, if you haven’t realised yet. It’s no longer a drink for the old man in his library leather chair with his cigar, it’s freshened up and funky.

P.S. The Taste festival this year is really something to try out – I had so much fun tasting everything! I’d really recommend it for an evening out in Jozi. If you’re tweeting, hashtag is #TOJ2012 and handle is @TasteofJoburg